I began to see extra charges in our checking account--charges I hadn't made. When I asked Jamey about them, he said he hadn't made them either. I spent hours on the phone with the bank, with subscription companies, etc. Well, it turns out, he HAD made the charges. He just didn't know he'd done it. (There's that self-unawareness again).
When all was said and done, he had opened up multiple subscription accounts and changed most all our passwords. He had 3 subscriptions to Paramount TV, 2 to Apple TV, several Pay Pal accounts and many more. When he couldn't get into an account because he'd forgotten a password, he'd simply open a new one. He just pushes buttons when he can't get what he wants and pushing buttons creates charges as well. The added subscriptions amounted to almost $800 a month for several months, until I was able to reach all of the companies (and that is a challenge in itself these days).
Here are the steps I had to take. Maybe this will help other caregivers in dealing with a similar issue.
1. Identify the problem account(s).
2. See if you can take care of it online (I found I had to call most and talk to a real person). Unfortunately, in this day and age, it's very difficult to reach anyone. I spent many hours on hold, just waiting for an actual person to help me.
3. Explain the dementia and see if they will consider wiping out the last month along with future months. (In the case of purchasing movies, they will not refund monies if the movie has already been viewed, even partially).
4. Put blocks on everything. Many companies will send a pin code to the designated "parent" so you can choose to give your loved the pin or hold it back. That way you always know what is going on in your account. The unfortunate thing about subscriptions to TV programming, is you cannot prevent someone from opening another account. If your loved one has good credit, they can go and open another account and you might never know. Streaming services don't care how many accounts you have open--it's money in their pocket.
5. I check the bank statement frequently. Any change? Get to the bottom of it quickly.
6. Because I am not savvy in technology, I had a trustworthy young man from church help me out. He was able to close most of the accounts for me. The biggest problem was figuring out the passwords.
We got everything in pretty good shape but then I noticed still another charge each month. Turns out Jamey had another Pay Pal account that he didn't remember, and they were taking money out each month for something he wasn't even using. That had been going on far longer than 2 months.
I'm still finding new purchases some months, but I've been able to catch them quickly. Most companies will not allow you to block an account from an account holder, so you have to close out that specific account or subscription, completely, and reopen a new one in your own name. Don't even include your loved one as a joint name. This won't solve the issue of opening new accounts, but you'll at least have a handle on current finances.
I would encourage you to talk to your loved one before you encounter anything. You can set up child blocks, even before signs of dementia. It only adds a short step to the buying process, and you'll never be "surprised". If you're in charge of the finances, make sure you're checking every month. Part of our problem was that I didn't check in with the bank as often as I should have. I paid for that, in more ways than one.
Since the computer is one of my husband's only sources of entertainment, I'm not ready to take that from him yet. But I keep a very close eye on what he's doing and what he's watching, now.
We lost quite a bit of money from this little dementia episode, but it was a valuable lesson. Never assume anything, keep a good eye on your finances, and always know what your loved one is doing. I must admit, it's difficult to be aware, without nagging or hovering, but it's important to protect yourselves from the beast that is dementia!
No comments:
Post a Comment